Big Moments
by SaturnineSunshine
Summary: “'You’re drunk, Chuck,'” she said again. 'I’m honest when I’m drunk.'” Two moments in Chuck and Blair's relationship that turn out to be very big indeed.


A/N: Since I got an alright response before, here's another one shot that has quotes from Buffy. They just work, but whatever.

Summary:

"Don't do that," Chuck said, leaning himself against the soothing, cold porcelain. "Don't talk to me like that."

"You're drunk, Chuck," she said again, as though she were trying to find all the reasons in the world that he didn't love her. She was so wrong.

"I'm honest when I'm drunk."

* * *

_The bottom line is, even if you see them coming, you're not ready for the big moments. No asks for their life to change. Not really. But it does.__So what are we helpless? Puppets? No. The big moments are going to come. You can't help that. It's what you do afterwards that counts. That's when you find out who you are._

_-Whistler_

_--Becoming_

* * *

_The bottom line is, even if you see them coming, you're not ready for the big moments. No asks for their life to change. Not really. But it does._

Pain. Pleasure. He could feel it in her. The way she writhed and clenched her eyes against the tears.

Then suddenly… it was over. Her tear glazed eyes opened slowly and looked into his dark ones. And everything was beautiful. She was beautiful. Her blood was beautiful. The sweat gliding between her shoulder blades was beautiful. The leather interior was beautiful. And for some strange reason, so was he. It was unfathomable, but when she looked at him, it was as if she saw something in him. She would be the first person. The only.

No more neglect or disappointment. No more hiding behind shinier and brighter friends. She reveled in the dark. Just like him. And everything was beautiful.

This shouldn't have happened. That much was obvious. Maybe he should have seen it, or maybe he shouldn't have. It was in the little moments.

Some girl would have her hair burned off by a Nairtini and she would smirk evilly. Nate, once again, would favor her best friend over her (again) and there was that vulnerability that she would suddenly freeze her mask over. Her father would call from Lyon and there would be a softness in her eyes that meant her heart was breaking. Once again, a man she trusted had squandered it.

Those were one of the things he should have noticed that would lead him down this path. But never would he have thought that the golden couple would break up. Never would he have dreamed that she would no longer be untouchable. Forbidden. Out of bounds. But it happened. And so did they.

It definitely wasn't supposed to happen. He didn't want this. He didn't want the revelation that love actually existed and wasn't made up by Hallmark to sell merchandise. He always sneered at those loving couples and the hand holding never realizing that he would actually be one of those people. One of the people who would vie for the attention of the one person who could crush his heart the most.

He didn't want to feel weak and vulnerable but it happened.

So only clad in an ivory slip, he took what never belonged to him. And he liked it.

* * *

_So what are we helpless? Puppets? No. The big moments are going to come. You can't help that. It's what you do afterwards that counts. That's when you find out who you are._

Chuck groaned as his insides clenched again, expelling all the alcohol he had ingested that night. And then he was at peace.

Cool and soothing hands brushed his neck, grounding him. Her scent surrounded him and he knew he would be alright.

Blair pushed his hair from his forehead, staring deep into his eyes on the bathroom floor of his suite. She wasn't really looking at him. Not really. She was seeing if his vitals were alright. She wasn't looking into his soul. She was just checking.

And after that he just decided to be an idiot. He didn't know why. It wasn't like it was a good idea at the time or anything. Actually, that was probably why. They both had a habit of saying something of that magnitude at the worst possible moments.

"I love you," he slurred with intoxication. He wasn't sure how much of that was due to the actual alcohol.

Blair sighed as she rolled her eyes.

"You're drunk, Bass," she said familiarly.

That was all this was. She was just here as a friend. Well that would not suffice. She had to know. He couldn't understand how she didn't know it already, after everything that had happened, but she had to know. Now.

"I love you," he said, more firmly this time.

"No."

"Listen…"

"No, Chuck," she said, as if she were actually angry at him. "You don't mean it."

"I do," he said helplessly. "I know you're engaged now or whatever, but you have to know."

"We're not talking about this now," she said dismissively.

"Don't do that," Chuck said, leaning himself against the soothing, cold porcelain. "Don't talk to me like that."

"You're drunk, Chuck," she said again, as though she were trying to find all the reasons in the world that he didn't love her. She was so wrong.

"I'm honest when I'm drunk."

"Sometimes…" she said distantly.

He knew what she was thinking about. But he only said those things to push her away. He wasn't being honest because he wanted to save her from himself. Now, he knew better. He just wanted her. Sans fiancé.

"I tried," he whispered, lying down on the tile. He wasn't sure if she heard him.

"I know," she said softly.

She knew.

"I tried to be good for you," he mumbled into the floor. It was a wonder that she could actually understand him. "I tried to be better."

"You didn't have to," Blair said with sincerity. "You just had to be you. You're Chuck. That's all that matters."

"What does that even mean?" he asked weakly.

"It means…" Blair said, struggling to actually say the words. "I love Chuck. At least you know that now."


End file.
